May 22, 2008

Where's The Tugs?

If you've typed in www.caninemafioso.com looking for tugs toys, you're probably wondering why the hell you ended up at the blog site instead. You're eyes aren't deceiving you...


I've made www.caninemafioso.com the address for The Canine Mafia's blog. With work taking up most of my time, it's unfortunate that I no longer have time to make tugs.

I'm sorry. Vinnie says he's disappointed, too.



However, if you are in the market for a vinyl football, Bruno says he can sell you one!

May 18, 2008

You can fry an egg....

It is blazing hot today. Poor Vinnie's tongue has been out non-stop today. Vinnie's tongue is our barometer for the heat. The longer it gets, the hotter it is outside.



The Mafiosos generally do not let the heat interfere with their planned activities. In fact, they sometimes adjust their activities to let the heat work for them. Gino tried working on his tan.



Only to later shout...


It's too farcking hot out here!"

There's only one cure for heat like this: The River!


Even though it was over 100 degrees when we were out there, we were a little hesitant to just jump right in the water. Bruno called us chickens and jumped right in...and stood right back up!



"HOLY SH*&! THIS WATER IS FREEZING!"




No, really, the water was that cold. Gino says that real dogs don't even feel how cold the water is. So this confirms his theory of Bruno being a big huge wimp.



"WIMP!"




Vinnie used his tongue, a.k.a. baormeter, confirm that the water was indeed really cold.



"Yup, this water approximately 53.6 degrees Fahrenheit."




Despite Vinnie's temperature prediction, Gino still believed that Bruno is a wimp for not swimming in ice cold water. He keeps rubbing in Bruno's face by swimming in front of him while shouting "Sissy! Big headed sissy!!"






Finally, Bruno could take no more teasing from Gino. He took the plunge and submerged himself in the waters.





Once Bruno acclimated to the cold water, he wasted no time doing his usual...clearing the river of huge logs. It isn't a trip to the river until Bruno finds the largest log and brings it back to shore.




Gino said that most of you will probably be impressed by the size of that log. But he wants you to know that anyone can grab a log like that. Really, it's no big deal!


See, even he can do it!




I tried to talk to Gino about calling his brother a sissy and a wimp. I explained that calling his big brother names is not very nice.

He said he was sorry.



"I'm sorry. Wait, no, I'm not. I'm too cute for you to stay mad at."





Dammit, I hate it when he's right. :-)


May 4, 2008

Hula Hooping The Day Away

The weather is absurdly pleasant lately. The Mafiosos decided that a romp at the school yard was definitely on the agenda today.


When we got there, Vinnie took off flying again.



"Up, up and away!"



Damn that flying Pug. I'm going to have to attach anchors to him pretty soon.


Bruno ran around frantically looking for any dodge balls that the children sometime leave behind.


"Balls! Balls!! WHERE ARE THEY?!?"



Little did he know that Ryan already scooped up all the dodge balls and threw them behind the fence. Poor Bruno had no balls to play with. :-(



But, wait! Who needs dodge balls when you have a hula hoop?!



"This will do!"




Hula hoops are fun for the humans too. They provide endless laughs as The Mafiosos erupt in millions of face contortions in chase after the hula hoop.


"Must. Get. Hula. Hoop."





It's also a barrel of laughs to watch Bruno fail miserably at chomping into the hula hoop!


"Doh!"




But once you land a nice chomp into the hula hoop, a fun time is had by all!







But you must know that every hula hoop comes with a Black Pug as a wing man. The Black Pug's job is to herd you should you stray far from the course...


"To the right! Move your huge butt to the right!"



And to also provide morale boosts in the form of cheers...



"Awesome catch, Meathead!"



But be warned that if you move too slow, the Black Pug will not say nice things!



"#$&*^! Move faster next time!"





Before we knew it, it was time to go home. Bruno threw a hissy fit when we told him it was time to leave the hula hoop.


"NO!"





" I don't wanna leave my hula hoop!"





"But perhaps we can strike a deal for some cookies..."




Bruno gives the hula hoop two dew claws up for entertainment value, durability and overall joy. Get yours today!


May 3, 2008

Scaled Enemies

Anchovy has been working really hard all month on landscaping his domain.






He's been moving rocks, reshuffling the sand and, much to Ryan's dismay, knocking off the water heater. I guess he believes a better place for the heater is not where Ryan keeps putting it!

Lately, Bruno has been feeling some negative energy coming from Anchovy.


"I sense you dislike me."




Anchovy gets extremely upset whenever Bruno approaches the tank. Anchovy flares up and issues a silent challenge to Bruno: move your big head or lose it.







This upsets Bruno greatly. Why does everyone make fun of his big head?




"Mama, can I eat him for dinner? Please?
He said he would eat my humongous head!"







"Momma, why does everyone say I have a freakishly large head?'





Because you do, Bruno. You just do.
ⓒ 2012 Mary Williams All Rights Reserved.