Dec 23, 2009

Holiday Break!

Readers, The Mafiosos would like to inform you that they will back in 2010. And with a bang. They will not let you down.

They have asked me to provide you with another "WTH?!" moment for this week's adventure.
Please feel free to caption. . .



Dec 16, 2009

Chihuahua Confessions

Carmela has a confession she is prepared to make. Apparently, she is obsessed with shoes. Completely, utterly obsessed. She can 't stop buying them! She can't walk by a store without going inside to see if there are any cute pairs in her size. Just last week, I bought . . .

Um, I mean, *SHE* bought four new pairs. She has to be stopped. So the first step is for her to admit there's a problem.



"I don't have a problem!
The only problem I see is
not enough closet space!"






"You really can't blame me for buying these.
They are completely delicious!
I had to get them."






"What?
These totally call out to
my wild, animal side!"







"And every gal needs a pair of
bedroom stripper shoes for her man."







WAIT, WHAT?! You have a man?





"Don't ask questions you aren't
prepared for.
Here, let me distract you."






"I also own lots of fabulous flats!"






"Yeah, these here would be
your tasteless shoes.
I don't wear stuff like this.
I'm a lady."






"Seriously. I didn't buy these."





"I'm more into girly shoes."







"Here's my newest pair!"





"I look FAB-UUUU-LESS!"

Dec 14, 2009

Monday Madness

Posting on Tuesday and Thursdays has caused me to become backlogged on other tasks I need to complete around the house. I only realized this as I prepared to get dressed this morning and realized I have no clean clothes due to fiddle dicking on the internets all day Saturday and Sunday.

So readers, please forgive me, but I will have to post one weekly adventure from here on out. I will post every Wednesday. Every one needs a little pick me up on Wednesdays, right? The weekend is oh so near and we've gotten to the worst of the week over. All we need is a little push to remind us we can make it until Friday. And The Mafiosos will diligently give you that push. :-)

And, because I have no clever caption or reasoning behind this moment, I present to a famous "What the hell?!" Mafioso moment to help you survive Monday.

Dec 10, 2009

Popcorn Pups: Part II

Bruno plays the popcorn game pretty well. He also has had lots of practice over the years.


Perhaps it's his Freakishly Large Head (FLH) that allows him to stand still in one place and effortlessly land a flying popcorn into his mouth.






Bruno won't lie. He was really impressed with Vinnie's rapture move. So impressed, he decided to give it a spin. Who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks?









"You gotta lift your chest higher, "advises Vinnie.
"Do it like this!"




Bruno's a quick learner!






He's also very damn diligent about not letting one kernel escape!







But, because of his extremely bad hips, I didn't want him to keep trying out the rapture move. I decided to give him easy throws...just don't tell him, ok? ;-)







At first I really believed Carmela didn't understand the rules of the popcorn game.

I'd throw one and she'd just watch it fall to the ground. She'd then look at me as if asking...




"Why are you throwing
stuff at me?!"





She would just watch it go by in front of her and then stand there perplexed when it landed on the floor.



"Honestly, it's rude
to throw things at people."




Vinnie was super tempted on more than one occasion to intercede.






But I had to tell him to get back in order to help Carmela learn the rules of the popcorn game.



"Ok, you throw another kernel
at my face and kiss your
ankles goodbye!"





It was then I realized she knew the rules of the game. She was just choosing to not follow them. She's smart enough to reinvent the rules so that they suite her better.



"Alright, new rules.
You will hand feed
popcorn from now on.
Got it?
None of this expecting me to eat
popcorn off the dirty floor!"






What can I say? I'm a really keen about my ankles!



























Dec 8, 2009

Popcorn Pups: Part I

I dragged Ryan to watch "New Moon" with me this past weekend. He said the best part of the movie was the bucket of popcorn.

Naturally, the huge bucket was refilled before leaving the theater and then it hit me. . . how nuts would The Mafiosos go for some popcorn?




"Depends," answer the Pugs.
"Did you get butter on it?"




Why yes I did!


"THEN BRING IT ON!" exclaims Vinnie.



Vinnie has a few popcorn catching moves that he's perfected throughout the years. He starts off by standing up on his back legs. . .




This gives him the best view for maximum popcorn landing distance calculations. I'm sure he has a few algorithms he runs through his head before choosing the exact angle at which to stand on.



Success!


"CHOMP!"



Poor Gino doesn't really understand this game. He's used to me giving him things out of my hand.



"Ok, how does this thing work?" asks Gino.



Well, the rules are simple. I throw a popcorn and you get it.











Ok, staring at it with your huge bug eyes isn't going to help. You actually have to move towards it. And try opening your mouth this time.



"Like this?"




Yes. . . kind of! Watch the popcorn carefully in the air . . .



"Like this?"




"And then open your mouth real wide,
like this!" instructs Vinnie.






"Like this?"



Kind of. . . lose the bug eyes though! They freak me out!



"Ok. How about like this?!"



Yeah! Now we're talking! Now try jumping like Vinnie does...that seems to help!



"Like this?!"



Um...yeah, like that. But we're not reenacting the rapture over here. Just go with your natural movements.



"That's a sweet move!" shouts Vinnie.
"I'm so stealing this new move!"





"Rapture Pug!"





"This new move kicks ass!"





"Lemme try his bug-eyed move
and see how that works!"






"Doh!"



Try coordinating your moves next time Pugs! This will help you avoid collisions!




"MORE! MORE POPCORN!
GIMME MORE!!"



Alrighty there . . . I think it's time we cut you off from the popcorn. You're getting just a tad bit psycho there!


"NO! Don't cut me off!"
Just one more! Please!"





"NOM!"





To Be Continued . . .

Dec 3, 2009

A Friendly Warning

If you're doing holiday shopping this week, Bruno wants to be careful. There a lot of crazy shoppers and it's a jungle out there!

Danger lurks...

Dec 1, 2009

Turkey Recovery

Over here at Casa De Mafioso, we're recovering from too much turkey, pie, stuffing and mashed potatoes. I was pretty much recovered by the next day (what? did ya'll use Black Friday shopping as your cardio like I did?), but Bruno seems to need some extra time.


turkey recovery

How about ya'll? Did you recover or are you heeding Bruno's advice to take the week to fully recover?
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