Oct 31, 2008

Happy Howl-O-Ween!

The Canine Mafia wishes you a happy Howl-O-Ween!

"You stupid copper!
You'll never get those
charges to stick! "

"I want my lawyer!"

The Fun Police takes prisoners regardless of size.
You've been warned!

Fortunately for you, there is one member of The Fun Police that can be bribed. But it will cost you!

"In exchange for 100 cookies,
I can look the other way."

As with all holiday, please remember the safety of your pets during Halloween. Make sure to keep that chocolate out of reach! Also, if you light candles or pumpkins in indoors, make sure that they are out of reach of wagging tails. Sometimes, those pesky tails knock things over. ;-)

Lastly, please make sure to block access to the open door from your dog while handing out candy to the trick-or-treaters. Many dogs are hit by cars this time of year as the bolt through an open front door.

Have a safe Howl-O-Ween!

Oct 29, 2008

Craptastic Day

After being told Blue was doing so well that she could come home today, I instead received news that she is vomiting again and her nausea has returned full force. So she needs to stay tonight at the vet's for monitoring. It has been one week since she's been hospitalized; we are walking on eggshells, praying hard that she recovers swiftly. This is how my craptastic day started. All I kept thinking about was Blue and I was in a funk all day long.

I only prayed that the evening could get better...and it did.

I came home to discover Carmela had a package waiting for her. I quickly asked her what the hell she had ordered this time and started to fear she racked up massive debt ordering cookies, collars and beds online. I had visions of begging the vet to let me make payments on Blue's bill and hoping the vet would believe that Carmela maxed out my credit card.

But then I quickly remembered that usually packages addressed to Carmela come from our very good friends. I took one look at the return address and felt myself smiling when I read the name "Diamond."

Diamond is an American Bulldog who has the best smile in the entire world. She's also Bruno's girlfriend, albeit a long-distance one.

"Dontcha wish your smile
was hot like mine?"

Diamond is best known for The Couch Incident. Diamond one day got stuck in the couch. Her mom, Susan, came home to find this scene:

This is one of the many reasons we love Diamond. :-) Diamond also shares Bruno's addiction to Block Dog Collars. See, they were meant to be!

Diamond and Bruno frequently talk to each other about the humiliations they are constantly put through. They talk about running away together and never having to wear another silly outfit again.

But they usually come to their senses once they realize that it would be very tough for them to buy cookies and toys (especially Frisbees!) without their moms.

Back to the package...

Carmela was ecstatic to receive another gift in the mail.

"I bow down to thee
glorious package!"

"Lemme go get some
scissors to open it up."

"Ooooooh...what is all this?"

"Boots! No, make that
And shirts! Woo hoo!"

I think these shirts are highly appropriate. One reads "High Maintenance." Another says "Dog Park Queen." The last one is I think meant for me... Susan, are you calling me a ho?! :p

Diamond wrote a beautiful letter welcoming Carmela to the family.

Dear Carmela,

It is with much respect that I send you these shirts as a sign of my desire for a continued good relationship between the east coast Family and the west coast Family. If I can ever do you a favor--such as the removal of a particular individual in your household who might be holding you to unreasonable expectations of behavior, I'm just sayin'--please do not hesitate to give me some indication that you wish it to be so. I would be honored to execute the contract on your behalf.

With best regards,

Diamond "The Muscle"

P.S. I am also enclosing some gold lamé boots in case someone needs some extra presuading.

"Thank you, Diamond!"

p.s. I did not try to boots on Carmela yet as I did not want her to use Diamond's personal favor of "removing" me from the household for causing Carmela strife!

That Nagging Feeling...

Ever get that nagging feeling?

And the more you ignore it,
the louder the feeling seems to get in your head?

Gino refuses to be called a nag.
He likes to term "Friendly Reminder" better.

Well, at least Blue seems to know what I'm talking about. She always feels like there's someone silently nagging her too.

Oct 27, 2008

They Call Me Mellow Yellow

"Ma! Ma! Lookie what I found!"

"Hello Mr. Yellow Ball!
Do you feel elated? Don't let the feeling last long
because soon you will soon be deflated! Ha ha!"


"I love you, Yellow Ball!"

"Okay, fine. Take the Yellow Ball away.
But will you at least give me a cookie?"

Oct 25, 2008

Blood Donor Bruno

"Woo-hoo! The car has stopped!
We're here!"

This is the vet's,
isn't it???"

Bruno decided to see if he could qualify to be a canine blood donor for the UC Davis Animal Blood Bank. It only took one hour to see if we could help canines in need. Every year, UC Davis veterinarians perform 200 to 300 blood transfusions to treat conditions ranging from surgical complications to kidney failure.

Did you know dogs have 13 types of blood? During our visit today, Bruno was screened to for diseases and to qualify his blood for which one of the 13 types he posseses. We received the results of his blood screening for free in addition to a health check with a veterinarian.

"Ok, Ma you know the drill..

It also was a good training opportunity for Bruno! We had to climb stairs and ride in an elevator, something we'd never done before. We met new people and we met a friendly male vet who was able to restrain Bruno when they withdrew blood.

If you know Bruno personally, you probably cringed at the words "male" and "restrained" and had images of Bruno barking his head off in an effort to get the bad man away. But the staff was very understanding and gave us all the time we needed to work at Bruno's pace in order to help Bruno feel comfortable.

"The staff here are all
A-OK by me!"

Our visit took less than an hour and we also received a goody bag!

These goodies for the dogs and goodies for the humans! From dog cookies to human food coupons, there is something there for everyone to enjoy.

(And I am still laughing my ass off that they included a Raiders sticker in there, since Ryan is a DIE HARD 49ers fan and cringes whenever I tell him I am going to buy Bruno a Raiders Collar. Ha ha!)

Coincidentally, the hospital is right across from where I work. After we were done with our visit, I decided to show Bruno where I work. I felt he needed to understand what I go through in order to earn that green paper that buys him all those cookies he eats.

"So this is where you wait for the bus?"

"It would be better if they had a
cookie dispenser in this booth."

"Ma! Look!
How did that dog get up there?"

"Excuse me!

Um, Bruno...that's not a real dog. It's a bronze statue erected as a memorial for dogs killed in the line of police duty.

"Hee hee...he's not real!
I knew that!"

Bruno says that donating blood is easy and, if you live within 100 miles of Davis, CA, you could qualify too! If you are interested in seeing if your dog qualifies, I encourage to sign up. More information can be found by clicking on the following link: http://www.news.ucdavis.edu/search/news_detail.lasso?id=8551

"That was easy!
Now break open those cookies
they put in that goody bag!"

Blue This Morning

My heart is breaking.

Oct 24, 2008

It's Not A Tumor!

Say it with me now!

"It's NOT A TUMOR!!"

This is good news for Blue! Now all we need her to do is keep food down and her odds of coming home get better! Thank you to all of you who have been sending nonstop juju and prayers for our evil blue kitty.

I get to visit her tomorrow and I am bringing her favorite cat treat: dried herring. It is like kitty crack. Hopefully, she'll take a lick or two!

We need you to come home, Blue! The house is in anarchy without it's leader!

Oct 23, 2008

Blue Update

I was able to see Blue today. She is completely yellow. Ironic that a cat named after a color ends up being the wrong one.

She perked up when she saw me and I stayed for an hour petting her to her heart's content. She can't come home yet. She can't be released until she starts to show interest in food on her own; until then, she is being force-fed.

As you can guess, she is not happy about the forced-feedings.

I had a pep talk with her. I told her she needs to eat so she can come home soon. She heard what I had to say, then promptly went to go hang out in the sink. Huh?!

All the juju and prayers everyone is sending our way seems to be working. If she's feeling spunky enough to hang out in the sink, then she's fighting these horrible disease.

Tomorrow, she has an appointment with an ultrasound specialist. An opaque area was found in her x-rays right underneath her liver and the vet wants to rule out a tumor. Please say a small prayer for Blue during 9:30 AM as this is when her ultrasound is scheduled. We'll even take miracles. Anything you can send our way is greatly appreciated. ;-)

Oct 22, 2008

We Need Your JuJu

Our beloved Blue is currently experiencing liver failure.

Blue refused to eat any food for a day and a half. When she refused breakfast this morning, we rushed her to the vet. Our vet diagnosed her with Feline Hepatic Lipidosis (or Fatty Liver Disease). The cause of her state is unknown; tests are still pending to rule out any toxins or bacterial infections. Currently, she is being force fed via a tube and is on IV fluids for dehydration.

Although The Canine Mafia will never admit it, Blue secretly runs The Organization. She is the hidden consigliere that operates behind closed doors. We need her back in full force!

Please keep Blue in your thoughts and send her speedy recovery vibes. The Canine Mafia thanks you from the bottom of our hearts.


We went to visit our good friends Clio and Murphy.

By we, I mean just me, because well...because sometimes I just need to see some of my canine friends without worrying about my own four dogs. Selfish I know!

I want Clio all to myself!

And I don't want to share Murphy!

Murphy sits funny.
I like that!

Clio is usually über refined,
but I caught her in a moment of silliness!

I love these two!

Oct 20, 2008

Grass Monkeys!

Pugs are highly easy to entertain. You can create just about any game as long as the game includes something edible and Pugs are willing to play.

Case in point: The Grass Game.

Throw grass in the air, and The Pugs will launch themselves as if pieces of bacon were being flung.

Bruno thinks this game is really lame and that Pugs are stupid. After all, a stick is waaaaaaay better than grass being flung at you!

Bruno does admit that the upside to this game is watching The Pugs make themselves looks like fools. Usually, they don't have to try too hard, but whenever they play this game, they exemplify foolishness!

(Gino throws in some tinkle toes action in this shot!)

You can laugh at The Pugs as they pull out defensive moves...

Or as the whip out Matrix-style moves...

You can laugh at them when they try to use their tongue for extra leverage...

Okay, Vinnie, I think you went just a little too far with the using the tongue thing. This is just downright freaky!

But overall, you can just laugh. That's what Pugs are for!

ⓒ 2012 Mary Williams All Rights Reserved.